Gals' Night Out

Almost couldn't make it for the gal's gathering on Wed... But I managed to leave in time to join them for post-dinner coffee...

Somehow when we gals gather... unknowingly, the topic would always revolve around men... how bastardly they can be... how they can knowingly go ahead and do stupid things when they jolly well know that it'll hurt their loved ones deeply...

I know nobody's perfect, not that I have not committed such a mistake before... but then to commit it time and again... to the same person... then there's probably a huge problem.

Either you have a huge commitment problem or your partner simply sucks big time...

I mean if your partner can satisfy you in all areas, why then would you wanna be looking for love elsewhere? Isn't that enough? OR are men just like that... One is never enough... The more, the merrier? Or is it cause after awhile, sex with the same person gets too boring? There's no more interesting conversation? Life gets routine? There're a million and one possibilities...

Then we went into the whole sex and relationship issue... IS SEX REALLY CRUCIAL FOR A RELATIONSHIP TO WORK?

My take is that to a certain extent yes... not that I'm some sex-crazed maniac lah... but I think for it to last & to last happily, it has, to a certain extent, an impact on the relationship... More for marriage...

Imagine being in a marriage where the sex is bad, the conversation boring and a routine every weekend... That's like the worse nightmare ever... There must at least be something that's really good...

So we came to a conclusion that though it's not all there is to a happy & fulfilling relationship, it however, plays a very important part in building a fulfilling and loving relationship with your partner. The act of intimacy with someone you truly love is magical... nothing can ever create that kind of closeness and bond the two of you share...

To me, it's beautiful... it's magical... but only with someone you love... Which is why I can never ever have a ONS... it's just so dirty, the thought of it... yes, maybe I could kiss someone I barely know... but no, I can't sleep with that same someone whom I barely know. A friend has ever commented that I'm uptight... I wonder if I really am... But then that's my own personal value... not imposing it on anyone... but also, don't try to impose your views on me... I don't condemn people having ONS, it's just that, I personally wouldn't do it... even if the attraction is strong... I'll still control myself and not allow myself to be in situations whereby the temptation will be too much to bear.

That said, I still wonder why men can be so detached when it comes to sex and love... I am amazed by their ability to separate sex from love... I mean I wouldn't mind being able to do that... wahaha.. contradicting myself aren't I... Oh well, anyway life's one big contradiction anyway...

Then we went on to talk about the whole point of getting married... Like why get married when there's no guarantee that things will work out...? Why do men want to get married when they know right from day one that being married doesn't mean they would not still fool around outside? Like why not then just keep jumping from one partner to another? Why have kids if you know you aren't able to stay committed... is that fair to the kid? NO!

This whole marriage and relationship thing is so messed up in this modern society that sometimes, I see no point in both... but then, somehow, you always find yourself caught in the middle of something you always want so desperately to run away from... There's no running away... it always catches up with you anyway...

I always trust my bfs fully until they do something to destroy that trust... and trust me, once it's destroyed, it ain't easy getting my trust again... True-blue cancerian here... But then, sometimes I question myself... Is it wise to fully trust someone? Does it get you nowhere? Is it always good to have this certain degree of reservation?

I don't know... maybe some would think I'm stupid, naive blah blah blah but then I see no point in worrying myself to death over something I have absolutely no control over. I mean even if you don't trust him fully, it does not mean that he wouldnt do anything to betray your trust.. Yes, maybe the hurt level would be lower... but isn't that like a self-fulfilled prophecy? Like you keep telling yourself, cannot trust him too much cause at least if he cheats on you, you wouldn't be that upset... then you aren't giving your best... And cause you aren't giving your best, your unknowingly, push him away... Could that be the case?

Sighz I don't know lah... just that all these talk always has a depressing effect on me... maybe I should like steer away from these topics next time yeah...