Head or Heart?
Cancer 22 Jun - 22 Jul
Stop running and confront your issues already. Beware of friends offering false council, just because they don't know better. If you're bothered by love, now's a time to ignore your head and follow your heart.
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When something happens, we would usually have two sets of solutions to the problem. One from the heart and the other from the head.
One being the more "irrational" one, so to speak while the other is the "rational" one.
It's always easier to follow your head 'cause you know without a doubt that it's a no-brainer... and probably by listening to your head, you'll save yourself from alot of heartache.
Listening to your heart on the other hand, usually involves one to take on a unconventional route which most prolly wouldn't. It requires lots of courage for one to listen to the heart instead of the head. More often then not, you would probably be taking a huge leap into the unknown... whereas if you follow your head, you'll be removing all elements of uncertainty from your life the instance a decision is made.
All my life,I've always listened to my head... I always have too many considerations when I'm about to embark on something. I think of a thousand and one reasons to justify why I should do what I'm going to do. Eventually, I back out and settle for the safer choice just 'cause I do not want my life to be subjected to such uncertainties should I decide to listen to my heart instead.
Safe might not be what's best for me. As a result, I have missed out on alot of possible life-changing opportunities. All just because I think too much and am too fearful.
Like when I was 17, I was given the chance to be groomed by a well-known artiste management company. Then, I had to choose between my studies or the contract. Not that thay wanted me to give up my studies, but just that all the singing, dancing, acting classes alone would leave me with no time even for myself. Therefore, it was either this or that. I had to make a choice... No prizes for guessing which I chose.
I went back to my mundane life, carried on studying a course which wasn't even something I liked... Passed and graduated with a Diploma. I made that choice as I wasn't sure if I would find success in what I was going to do... Would I be famous? Would I get offers? There were too many uncertainties... As a result, I settled for the safer choice. Was I happy? I wouldn't say I'm totally happy. Yes, I graduated but whatever I studied was something which I totally had no interest in.
On the contrary, if I had chose to sign that contract, maybe I would be someone today. Or maybe I would be doing something I really enjoy and at the same time making good money.
Or the time where I had to choose between 2 men... One being the safer and more stable one while the other one was a dream but not as stable. Again, I stuck to the safer choice. Look what happened in the end? I was stuck in an unsatisfying relationship for 3 years. Had I listened to my heart instead, I might have been happily married now 'cause he always talked about our future... A future which always brought a smile to my face whenever we talk about it and which still puts a smile one my face whenever I think of it now.
Who knows? No one has answers to that & since I've given up those opportunities, I shan't look back anymore. It's pointless.
What's disappointing is that time & again, I keep making the same mistakes. I keep holding back just because I'm fearful. Fearful of the unknown & not knowing what the future holds... It scares me alot sometimes.
But now, I'm even more fearful that I'll carry on living, listening to my head my whole life. I really do not want to live a life where I only obtain like, 40% of satisfaction. If I had been more courageous, I would perhaps have found more meaning and satisfaction out of life. Even if I would fail, then perhaps I would emerge a winner all the same because I'll learn from my failure.
Now, enough of all the bullshit and deliberation. I've decided to learn to listen more to my heart and be a braver girl. To just go on and give my all in doing what I WANT to do, instead of fulfilling others' expectations of me!
My head tells me to leave him.. but my heart tells me to carry on... My head tells me I should do banking... but my heart tells me I should give flying a try... I've really decided...
I'll give flying a try... Besides what's 3 yrs? What's 16 mths? If it doesn't work out, I still have next 2 decades of my life to make things right again. If I've placed my faith in the wrong man, then I'll take it as a lesson learnt. There're no certainties in life. I've long realised that. Only thing I'm certain of is that I'll die... we'll all leave this world one day anyway... So might as well make full use of whatever little time we have here to do things which we want to do... which would make us happy and make life meaningful and exciting.
I just hope I wouldn't be disappointed... especially not by him. I choose to see whatever path I'm going to take as something I'm doing for my own good... Not entirely for him... 'cause asking me to live without him now is gonna be hell for me. I just pray that he feels the same way too...
Stop running and confront your issues already. Beware of friends offering false council, just because they don't know better. If you're bothered by love, now's a time to ignore your head and follow your heart.
********
When something happens, we would usually have two sets of solutions to the problem. One from the heart and the other from the head.
One being the more "irrational" one, so to speak while the other is the "rational" one.
It's always easier to follow your head 'cause you know without a doubt that it's a no-brainer... and probably by listening to your head, you'll save yourself from alot of heartache.
Listening to your heart on the other hand, usually involves one to take on a unconventional route which most prolly wouldn't. It requires lots of courage for one to listen to the heart instead of the head. More often then not, you would probably be taking a huge leap into the unknown... whereas if you follow your head, you'll be removing all elements of uncertainty from your life the instance a decision is made.
All my life,I've always listened to my head... I always have too many considerations when I'm about to embark on something. I think of a thousand and one reasons to justify why I should do what I'm going to do. Eventually, I back out and settle for the safer choice just 'cause I do not want my life to be subjected to such uncertainties should I decide to listen to my heart instead.
Safe might not be what's best for me. As a result, I have missed out on alot of possible life-changing opportunities. All just because I think too much and am too fearful.
Like when I was 17, I was given the chance to be groomed by a well-known artiste management company. Then, I had to choose between my studies or the contract. Not that thay wanted me to give up my studies, but just that all the singing, dancing, acting classes alone would leave me with no time even for myself. Therefore, it was either this or that. I had to make a choice... No prizes for guessing which I chose.
I went back to my mundane life, carried on studying a course which wasn't even something I liked... Passed and graduated with a Diploma. I made that choice as I wasn't sure if I would find success in what I was going to do... Would I be famous? Would I get offers? There were too many uncertainties... As a result, I settled for the safer choice. Was I happy? I wouldn't say I'm totally happy. Yes, I graduated but whatever I studied was something which I totally had no interest in.
On the contrary, if I had chose to sign that contract, maybe I would be someone today. Or maybe I would be doing something I really enjoy and at the same time making good money.
Or the time where I had to choose between 2 men... One being the safer and more stable one while the other one was a dream but not as stable. Again, I stuck to the safer choice. Look what happened in the end? I was stuck in an unsatisfying relationship for 3 years. Had I listened to my heart instead, I might have been happily married now 'cause he always talked about our future... A future which always brought a smile to my face whenever we talk about it and which still puts a smile one my face whenever I think of it now.
Who knows? No one has answers to that & since I've given up those opportunities, I shan't look back anymore. It's pointless.
What's disappointing is that time & again, I keep making the same mistakes. I keep holding back just because I'm fearful. Fearful of the unknown & not knowing what the future holds... It scares me alot sometimes.
But now, I'm even more fearful that I'll carry on living, listening to my head my whole life. I really do not want to live a life where I only obtain like, 40% of satisfaction. If I had been more courageous, I would perhaps have found more meaning and satisfaction out of life. Even if I would fail, then perhaps I would emerge a winner all the same because I'll learn from my failure.
Now, enough of all the bullshit and deliberation. I've decided to learn to listen more to my heart and be a braver girl. To just go on and give my all in doing what I WANT to do, instead of fulfilling others' expectations of me!
My head tells me to leave him.. but my heart tells me to carry on... My head tells me I should do banking... but my heart tells me I should give flying a try... I've really decided...
I'll give flying a try... Besides what's 3 yrs? What's 16 mths? If it doesn't work out, I still have next 2 decades of my life to make things right again. If I've placed my faith in the wrong man, then I'll take it as a lesson learnt. There're no certainties in life. I've long realised that. Only thing I'm certain of is that I'll die... we'll all leave this world one day anyway... So might as well make full use of whatever little time we have here to do things which we want to do... which would make us happy and make life meaningful and exciting.
I just hope I wouldn't be disappointed... especially not by him. I choose to see whatever path I'm going to take as something I'm doing for my own good... Not entirely for him... 'cause asking me to live without him now is gonna be hell for me. I just pray that he feels the same way too...
posted by paradox-is-me at 2:12 AM
2 Comments:
Well said dear.
Why live life as dull Jane when you can be fun & unpredictable Jerelyn? =) You will bore me to death if u chose the other options for ur 2 decisions.
First, i am glad you r joining me in the skies. Then we can go shopping & gallavanting tog! More so, I dont have to buy nonsense for you. I can tell you: "GO & BUY IT YOURSELF BITCH!" Keke...
Okay, for the slightly more impt decision: I don't wanna or need to make any promises for Mr Skinny Vege Face. Just embrace whatever comes along in life! Nothing ventured, nothing gained!
Still concerned abt ya even though you prob think I have disappeared from the surface of the earth. Bz with mugging lah... Seems you have resorted to hunting me down at workplace. ;) See ya babe!!
way to go, gal.
safe is not always the best, if u have always stick to the safe side of the sidewalk, always doing what u think is right instead of what u want, u will have lived for nothing.
wat's life w/o dreams? wat's life if u r not doing the things u really really REALLY want to? abandon the safety net n reach for the skies. who knows. u might get the rainbow.
am behind u all the way. go go go!
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